Thursday, April 25, 2013

Keepin' the Motivation

An international adoption comes with so many hoops-of-fire to jump through. Wait. I mean, hoops-of-radioactive-fire-breathing-dragons! Keeping the motivation and positive drive is essential to remaining on top of the stress of the process.

There are those moments when we get cold feet. I have spoken to several friends who had biological children, and they all told me they had those moments too.

"Am I sure about this?"
"Will I be a good mom?"
"What if my child won’t love me?"
"Am I ready to be a parent? Because I love my freedom!"

These doubts are tripled when you are looking at the exorbitant costs of agency fees, orphanage fees, international lawyer fees, travel costs, and more. Even more, agencies send you a list of all the medical problems your adopted child ‘might’ have. We had to fill out forms where we had to look up the medical terms online before we even knew what the possible conditions were.
Suddenly you begin to doubt your entire sanity!

But, here is how we got past that insecure moment:
  1. You step back.
  2. Take a deep breath.
  3. Keep your eye on the ball.
  4. Somewhere, down the line at the end of all this, is our child that we will bring home. The rest is moot.
So, to keep our eye on the ball and keep our selves motivated through this stressful process of fees and paperwork collection, we plan to do these things:
  1. We have printed out photos of Ecuador, the map of the country, the flag, and photos of animals from the Galapagos and we are hanging them up around our home to keep us inspired.
  2. We have started to search for ‘Gotcha Day’ videos, and try to watch at least one a week. Some bring us to tears and re-inspire us.
  3. I have joined adoption groups online, at both Yahoo and Facebook. I found one specifically for those adopting from Ecuador. There is nothing like support from those who ‘get it’. 
  4. I am in search of a nice coffee table book about Ecuador. (If you know of one, send me the link!). Something with amazing photos.
  5. I would recommend getting the bedroom ready and painted, as I have seen others do - however, we cannot do that yet as we have to move first.
If you see this, then do reply with more ideas on how to stay inspired, motivated, and passionate during the long wait and paper-work process! :)

Image from Flickr CC: Some rights reserved by matttrent

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